Chemo number 2 in 4 days. I am preparing mentally, emotionally, and physically for battle. The enemy is clear in this war, but each battle is full of landmines, hand grenades, and unexpected friendly fire.
So I prepare for battle!
I make very certain that my support system is at the ready. I spend time with the people I can, call/ text others, and Facebook stalk the rest. It gives me strength to know I am surrounded by family and friends who are there if I need them.
Mom and I are Sis’s primary caretakers during the rough spots, so preparing for battle also means cleaning my house, doing dishes, and making sure I have enough clean clothes “just in case.” It is not unusual for Sis to end up in the er and/or hospital post chemo treatment.
Preparing for battle also means battling the ptsd that wants to take my thinking patterns hostage. One of my favorite strategies for staying in the present is to spend time alone outside, often at the lake at Potato Creek State Park.
There is peace by the water. The light plays on the water and mighty birds soar above it. The trees lining the shore stand guard and create safety and rest. Alone with the lake, I breathe deeply the beauty of my life and the hope of my future. Through this, I find the courage to continue the battle for my sister’sl life and well-being.